Bad economy, Bad weather, Bad roads, Bad drugs

The economy and weather is getting so bad, its effecting everyone with bad roads and even drug addicts. Almost hit a stoner trying to smoke a pot hole.

Saw a whole herd of addicts chasing a salt truck in thinking that it was dispensing free crack.

Saw an addict with a garden hose up his nose snorting snow. He got a bad brain freeze!

Its so cold saw an addict named Old Yellow shooting up antifreeze to stay warm.

Ooops Great Coffee

My wife found the best way to make a great cup of coffee by mistake. She forgot to add the coffee last night when she made it. She was so tired I guess. The pot turn on today and no coffee. Ooops she said then added coffee and ran the pot of hot water thru the maker. GINKNEEUS! Wow it was extra hot and strong. That was why I wrecked today cuzz I was wanting to drink it so bad. Wait a minute! Or was it a plan of hers to get rid of me????? HUMMMM!!!!

It's the Bumps in Life

Was driving back home from running the dog in the park. Reached for my cup of coffee, which was extra good today. Slip! Bam! Boom! In a deep snow filled ditch. Was doing the put it in drive put it reverse dance. No go! Got out dug all snow and ice out about a foot of it. Tried again. No go! Did this for about 20 mins. No passers by to help. Prayed thought prayed thought. Then the thought hit me. I am very strong one of my legs is stronger than a normal man. DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME! Stuck my leg out the door as I throw it into reverse moved car up and back. Took a few more times but bot ta boom bot ta bing out it went. It takes life's little bumps for us to dig a little deeper but when its over man it sure feels good. Oh yeah the check engine light went out. A little bump fixed it. BYYYEE!

Dog Tracks In the Snow

Walking my dog today in the icy snow I saw something I've never noticed before. As my dog passed me he had a nice gate going it was like a walk / run. I looked down and saw just two prints per four legs moving they were clean and organized. Then when he picked up the pace just a little tracks went back to four and were sloppy not having unity. I thought deep of the way I try to do things too fast sometimes. It's not my best work but when I go at a non alarming pace the work is great.

Stupid stuff

It's amazing how much my imagination works all day long. I see some crazy things in everyday life. Looked like today we had a bunch of drunk folks here in town. They weren't drunk they was dodging potholes. I saw one pothole so big it had a high dive. I saw on the news today where the stopped triple an Amber Alert. Yep they find the three kids you guess it in a pothole. You I am going to stop thinking about how bad things look and see how I can take from that and brighten someone day. BYYYE!

Perfect Crash

Ain't it amazing how a plane crash can be done so well. Them glider skills came in handy. It would be great if the banking and credit system could crash so well too. I feel that if we let it take its course then it can hit bottom. Pumping years of debt into it ain't doing nothing but putting a bandage on a shotgun blast. It needs to start at the top. How much money is getting pumped into the inauguration? Millions huh? They should be ashamed of themselves the money should be given to a poor needy BANKER!

Saving water in the winter.

I find out a great way to wash yer car twice with one money. First it has to be about 7 degrees or less. Put in yer money and click the spray setting at pressure wash. It's the ones with all the bubbles. I like bubbles they taste like soap which reminds me of my childhood when I said bad words. People use to call me white tooth Steve. Was white teeth but I had too many fights. Anyhow spray dirt off with the high pressure bubbles all over the car. Now here's the money saving part once yer car is clean keep spraying bubbles and they will freeze on yer car. Then dirt will get back on yer car then when it warms back up. All the dirt and mud will just slide off yer car. Smart huh? I am going to tell Al Gore tonight when we are cooking marshmallows over some tires. BYYYEE!